Teen S.a.S:
Smart about Sex

Media- a reliable source for information about sex?

What’s true, what’s not?

Sometimes media shows the real consequences of teen sex, but mostly not. Why? They are in the business of selling fantasies in order to sell products.

Do they care about you? If you practice the sexual behavior they make look so glamorous and become pregnant in high school, are they going to worry about that?  Will they stop showing movies in your town for even one minute because you got an STD and became sterile?

Sex Facts

– 6 in 10 U.S. teens NEVER had sex! (2015 Youth Risk Behavior Survey)

– 6 in 10 U.S. teens who did have sex say they wished they had WAITED!

– Youth who abstain from sex get BETTER GRADES in school and are less likely to drop out.

– More than 4 in 10 children in the U.S. are now born to unwed mothers (vs. less than 1 in 10 in 1960).

– Having children AFTER getting married and after the teen years DECREASES the risk of children growing up in poverty, having social-emotional problems, dropping out of school, engaging in teen sex, and having a child outside of marriage.

– Couples who live together before marriage have higher rates of marital conflict, infidelity, and divorce.

– Couples who delayed sex until marriage report the HIGHEST LEVELS of sexual satisfaction!

– Dating violence is 5 times more likely in teen relationships that involve sex. Young women 16-24 experience the highest rates of violence at the hands of someone they know.

– 3 out of 10 teenage girls get pregnant at least once. About a third get abortions. 20% of teen couples using condoms as birth control become pregnant within one year.

– About 50% of sexually active youth and young adults get a sexually transmitted disease (STD) by age 25. About 80% of people who have an STD don’t know it, but serious consequences can arise later…

– 4 out of 10 sexually active teens are infected with one of more than 27 common and widespread STDs!

– Several STDs are INCURABLE. Some can lead to infertility (inability to have children), child deformities and even death!

– You can get an STD such as herpes or HPV even if you use a condom because such infections are transmitted by skin-to-skin contact.

– Oral sex can spread herpes and other STDs to the mouth and throat.

– Herpes and syphilis can be transmitted to a baby during birth, causing brain damage or even death.

– Rates of depression and attempted suicide for sexually active girls (12 to 16) are 6 times higher than for virgins and 3 times higher for sexually active high school girls.

– 12- to 17-year-olds are among the largest consumers of online pornography, not exactly the greatest preparation for a healthy relationship!


A Teen’s Response

What does a healthy relationship look like?

 A teen’s response:

In my opinion, the key qualities of a healthy romantic relationship are honesty, commitment, attraction, intelligence etc.  Speaking from my personal point of view, it feels good knowing that my parents are all in for each other.  Knowing that they are always going to love each other and won’t let the outside world interfere with their relationship.

~ Alyssa, 18

How do I know if I am ready for sex?

 A teen’s response:

I can’t speak for all teens, however, my mother always encouraged me to wait until I was married because it is a part of our religion but she also encouraged me to tell her if I was ever ready to commit to a serious relationship.  However, I think I’m more comfortable to wait until I meet my husband to lose my virginity.  As a female, not speaking for all but I do know many that believe that their virginity is something very special to them, and I agree.  Your virginity is something sacred, something that should be cherished by someone who loves and appreciates you.

~ Alyssa, 18

Abused? What to do if in an unhealthy relationship.

A teen’s response:

I think teens and adults often stay in abusive romantic relationships because sadly they think they are in love.  Not to say they don’t want to leave, but it’s difficult when you really don’t have the resources to get out.   I honestly believe that the men (and some women) have this certain ability to break their partner down, kill their self esteem so that they never gain the confidence to leave them.

~ Alyssa, 18


Teens Speak Out

1. In your opinion, what are the key qualities of a healthy romantic relationship?

A healthy romantic relationship incorporates maturity. A lot of teens don’t understand that just because someone is older doesn’t necessarily mean they’re more mature. A good relationship starts with friendship as well as trust. Those are the two components that determine whether two people are truly compatible. Viewing one another as equals is an extremely important aspect in a romantic relationship to make ensure each partner’s voice is heard as well as understood.

2. Is it possible to be attracted to or even have strong feelings for someone who you really don’t know much about?

Yes, it is possible to be attracted to someone who keeps things hidden. It’s a part of human nature to be curious about one another. People often question others actions or try and decrypt a deeper meaning. Many teenagers fall in love with celebrities they’ve never met. The emotions they feel are a form of superficial love stemming from images, videos, sound recordings and overall an idea of what the person may be like. Not knowing someone very well allows room for an entire fantasy to fill in the blanks for reality causing a deeper attraction.

3. Why do you think some teens play games, use or manipulate romantic partners? Are they likely to have successful relationships when they get older?

Some teens may play games because they’ve been hurt by past partners. For fear of losing one person, they keep multiple partners around to satisfy their every need and ensure they’ll never be left alone. Another reason this may occur is because of the satisfaction of getting away with something one isn’t supposed to be doing. This is an unhealthy practice because this becomes a habit and possibly an addiction. When teens get used to multiple people showing them affection, it becomes difficult to settle down and commit to only one.

4. Why do teens and adults who are in an abusive romantic relationship often continue to stay in that relationship?

When dealing with an abusive romantic relationship, it can be difficult to recognize. Abuse comes in many forms, it isn’t always physical, the most recognizable form. It is especially complicated because lovers may be dependent on the person who is causing them harm. The person abusing their partner may be threatening to worsen the situation if they try to leave. Those involved in abusive romantic relationships often feel helpless, scared, alone and worst of all like they deserve it or that things will get better.

5. Is it wise to become sexually intimate with someone as a teenager?

It is absolutely not wise to become sexually intimate with someone as a teenager. Sexual intimacy is something that requires maturity and common sense due to its many risks. The risks are so extreme that avoidance is the absolute best option.

6. What do you think it feels like to a child to not have two committed parents?

Parents set an example of what to expect out of a relationship in the […]


Relationship Info

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“What’s a healthy relationship?” source: http://youth.gov/youth-topics

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Is it possible to be attracted to or even have strong feelings for someone who you really don’t know much about?

Attraction is based on hormones called pheromones, but does Nature know whether the person you are “turned on by” is wonderful person, or an immature jerk? No, you have to do “research” to find out the answer yourself! Meanwhile, be CAREFUL not to take any actions that you might regret later! It can take several months before someone’s real character reveals itself!